Official start?

I've always billed my "Fashion and Fiends" books as a trilogy. Book one about the twenty-something American supermodel whose low self-esteem allows her to fall victim to supernatural domestic violence. In book two, her fashion designer boss must deal with grief, a failing marriage and responsibility for the supernatural mess that has engulfed their lives.

Those two manuscripts-- Manipulations and Courting Apparitions-- have been worked and revised and the first one shopped and rejected but only 10 times before I got distracted by my offspring and the pursuit of a second bachelor's degree.

The third-- a work in progress I call Absolution-- focuses on the fashion designer's wife who must end the supernatural goings-ons before the universe introduces something greater to do it. 

But there's a good six or seven months between Courting Apparitions and Absolution. Recent revisions have made it so that the baby we learn about in book one isn't born in book two but is somehow six months old in book three.

My psyche is distraught over this so I can imagine a reader might have the same discomfort.

In the meantime, for fun, I started a new story. Not sure where it was going. I mentioned it/the main character in this blog: Jacqueline, the French military medic. I have a mild fascination with French colonial history and French-Algerian relations so her service as a doctor in the military allows me to explore that. I thought of her story as a companion, not a true part of the trilogy, until somehow the time and the place begins to fall into that big gap I had.

My husband protested that Jacqueline had nothing supernatural in her story, but she does, as she is related to the characters in the other books and her assignment in the army involves the supernatural stuff her brother-in-law kinda started.

So, Jacqueline's story, currently called Recovery, has officially joined "Fashion and Fiends" as the new book three (or book 2.5 in my nomenclature). But starting a new book is often near impossible. It commences with huge blows of inspiration and motivation until you realize you started at the wrong moment, that you can't find the beginning, and you haven't done the research.

After about five previous attempts, and writing Jacqueline into book two formally, I offer this:

Chapter One

Hoisting her eight-and-a-half month pregnant older sister, a stroke victim who had lost the use of the right side of her body, up swing-down stairs to the cabin of a Dassault Falcon jet had proven one of the most grueling challenges of Jacqueline’s near decade as a doctor in the military health services. 

Hey, It's January!

I neglect this blog terribly. Maybe that will change now that my only academic obligation is my honors thesis. Maybe not.

I'm working on a coming-of-age werewolf story where a teenage boy defeats the school bully. It's a short story, but the main character, Jules Zweigenbaum, grows up to be a player in some of my other novels. Plus, I've already gathered enough info on his past to give him his own novel. As it is, he makes his debut in Courting Apparitions. Although I do mention him briefly in Manipulations...

I recently completed another review for Hippocampus Magazine. This one explores Anthony Shadid's memoir, House of Stone. Rooted in Lebanon. Very cool.

I also have 150 pages on my honors thesis done.

And I have finished four newsletters for the Greater Lehigh Valley Writers group.

So my writer/editor muscles have flexed.

Chapter One AGAIN

Last night, I finished my first week of school and a hectic work week. After a week of lectures, it becomes hopeful that my psych class will be easier than I thought and maybe I do have time for everything.

Last night I didn't go to bed early. Instead of collapsing when my daughter went to bed, I rewrote chapter one of my second manuscript, Courting Apparitions. Except it wasn't a rewrite as much as stripping stuff out.

At the end of the first novel, two characters ended up bound together in an unusual circumstance and I thought this would impede the conditions for the start of the second book.

In the previous draft, the protagonist runs into the antagonist and his emotional state upon seeing the antagonist causes an event that sets the book in motion.

I thought that would be a problem if the antagonist had a partner and through that partner learned more about himself that would theoretically keep the event from happening.

But then I realized the simple answer, what if the antagonist went looking for the protagonist because he needed to revisit what happened in the previous book and this would upset the protagonist and spur the event that sets the book in motion.

The simple solution in writing is best 99% of the time.

New first line:
"No man ever deserved anything more than Étienne d'Amille deserved this beer right now."

Research

Besides the poem I wrote about my tooth, my writing time has been limited. I'm formulating a lot of ideas right now on how to revise my manuscripts, who to submit to next and what I'd like to do with my very brief pre-summer vacation. Summer class starts Monday.

I have many ideas and not much focus or energy, so I flit from idea to idea trying to find one that sticks. I have several ideas inspired by The Write Stuff and by the conference's keynote speaker agent Donald Maass. Those are for the manuscript I finished a month ago. I also have some concerns about Manipulations, the book I've been pitching, that I'd like to address. Primarily, the bad guy got tougher in book two and I think he needs to reflect that in book one.

I've resisted diving too far into Galen's back story because of the research I knew it would entail. Today I thought I'd read the passages that relate to his past and see if they spurred any idea of how I could strengthen them. I found something in this:


"A Huguenot couple had lost their daughter to a fever that their eldest son now had. They had traveled with him and his brother from the south of England. Hesper healed the boy. ... When it came time for the family to return to England, and escape the Irish climate, they offered the baby as payment. Or so Hesper had told him."

In my head I heard this voice say, "She lied."

I knew Galen's family were Huguenots from Bretagne (Brittany, the north of France). But what if the whole story was hooey? What if they fled Bretagne for some other reason? What if they left the south of England for the same reason?

I started with a quick internet search via the iPhone and discovered revolts in Bretagne, legends of Ankou, tidbits about the landscape and the language, and now I'm at the college library looking for more.

And Ankou? I haven't researched him here yet but he's Death, the Reaper. A skeleton in a shroud and flat Breton hat with an upturned scythe and an oxcart...

Sometimes with the right research, the story amazingly tumbles together as if you knew it all along.

Mourning 29

May 2 turned out to be one of my not-so-good days.

As readers of my food blog and my friends know, I fell on a neighbor's bad patch of sidewalk and spit up part of a tooth. I thought that was the end of that. One broken tooth. Turns out I have FOUR broken teeth (one of which was extracted, a rather significant molar) and stitches and lots of pain, ibuprofen and future dental bills with insurance kicking in less than 25% of the bill.

Meanwhile, I'm getting ready for bikini season whether I wanted to diet or not.

It gave me some opportunity to think about the characters in my novel. There is a lot of wounds everyone receives and I wonder if they recover appropriately.

I also wrote a poem, now in it's second draft.

This is the current opening of "Mourning 29":

29's departure brutalized me.
A jolt to the face,
A ravaging of my soul
When a shockwave
Erupted through my jaw
Into my ears and
Exploded
As I commenced my morning.
Then the pain subsided.
I thought the worst had passed.

Can I collapse now?

Yesterday I finished my current round of work on Courting Apparitions, the second volume in my Fashion and Fiends series that I am currently pitching to agents. Well, currently waiting to hear from one agent before I send the next batch of queries out.

I am exhausted, and I don't know whether it's the work-write-school-life balance is out-of-whack (potentially, school ends in TWO WEEKS. Next week is the last week of classes. Finals! Ack!)
 or that odd mental exhaustion that accompanies finishing a project.

Do you experience this? The sense of overwhelming relief and pride as you tie up loose ends and I the pleasure as you think about the good job you did... coupled with a smidge of grief that it's done, because it has been a focus. These feelings leave me tired and a tad lost feeling. It's the lost feeling that motivates most writers to undertake a new project.

I have to survive the school year first.

Working toward the end

I have three more chapters to revise of Courting Apparitions. And probably adding a prologue.

It was hard to get that far. During this past weekend, I wanted it over.

I've reached some of those points where things still aren't right. My critique group is pointing out flaws that my heart has known for a while... Donald Maass and his wife Lisa have given me ideas of how to strengthen the whole thing... And this means a fourth draft.

These are changes that may impact the ending.

So, why go on? Why not start over?

Why?

Because I believe in finishing. I believe in seeing it through to the end if only to prove that I can. Many can't. I want to see if the characters have any last surprises before I retreat to the beginning and impose my will upon them again.

This book has always been my problem child, but now it has merit. Someone had asked me at the conference if I planned on released book two to the world before book one, a tribute to Star Wars, and I had never pondered that. I could.

If I pitched book two to agents, and followed with book three, those books have more excitement and danger than book one. And book one explains why these characters went to so much trouble for each other in more depth. It certainly makes me wonder...

Asking what could happen

I revised a chapter yesterday, and I'm really happy with the results. Twisted things around from the early drafts. I thought I knew exactly where the next chapter would go. Since I was on a hot streak, I went at it.

I hated the result within 1,000 words.

I need a better transition between the last chapter's action and POV character and the next chapter's shift in POV & theme. So, I keep asking myself: "What would this POV character do next? What would happen?"

Now, I'm a big believer in writing it out and seeing where it goes, but I've made no progress that I like.

I realized tonight that I need to list all the things that could happen, even if only a remote possibilty, and select an option from there.

Two weeks

I have faced this still blog for two weeks, the automatic calendar item on my iPhone reminding me to write. I have ignored it. But today I could no longer ignore it.

I have written about 400 words in Courting Apparitions since school began. I have also written in my journal. I also wrote a 900-word essay on perceptions of North Africa today and the remnants of colonialism and imperialism.

I have edited for clients.

I have read Edward Said and textbooks.

I finally started Catching Fire, the sequel to The Hunger Games, while my husband reads Mockingjay, the final volume. Suzanne Collins rocks.

I have met with my critique group and "felt" problems with my pacing.

So, all of this non-creative writing activity has left me with time to organize my plot weaknesses and improve those pace problems. Even if merely in my head.

I hear a major publisher has opened up temporarily to queries from unrepresented authors, unsolicited manuscripts. I'm tempted. But part of me is less than thrilled.

I'm torn right now, because I want to write, but I also want to do a lot of other things-- like read. I can absolutely be the disciplined writer. It's hard for me not to write. But after this summer... my struggles with anemia and finally regaining my strength, I'm not sure how hard would be proper to push myself.

That is today's question: How hard should a writer push? Are those self-imposed deadlines and goals really the key to success?

I don't know, but Suzanne Collins is looking might attractive right now.

Cross the line

As writers, we all have passages that disturb us. Things we've written that chronicle the darkness in our own soul. Sometimes we hide these things. Sometimes we share them.

The characters whose argument gets violent.

The sex scene that turns intense in a non-standard way.

Hurting children.

Bombing civilians.

Exploring taboos.

Yes, I feel one of these coming.

Some writers write it as a purge and shove it in a drawer. Mine usually end up as pivotal parts of my dénouement.

Logistics

When certain moods strike, I love to write the naughty parts in manuscripts.

They always start WAY too long, going through every motion of the encounter and get hacked to pieces. These scenes often research (or merely thought), and not necessarily the "is this position physically possible?" kind (although that happens). Things like if she's 5' 2" and he's 5' 8" does she have to stand on tip toe to kiss him? Can your hand physically bend that way?

The other important part of a love scene is to make sure you edit ALL IN ONE SITTING. Because otherwise, you can miss important details.

For example, I have this:

"Confusion flashed in Zélie’s eyes and her lips parted. She released him, her hand falling to her side. Étienne brought his kiss to her clavicle and then closer to her breast. He spun her..."

Now in the original version that line about her hand falling away was not there, nor was the release. This doesn't seem like a big problem until you realize her hand was in his pants, holding something important for this scene, and he spins her around without letting go.

The reader can assume she let go, but since she's confused, maybe she didn't... and depending, that could be painful or merely lead to some getting twisted up and falling over... You get the idea.

And after you hack the scene down to its essence and have what you like, read it out loud. You may blush, but it's the only way to check how smooth it is.

The Reunion / The Hanged Man

I'm working out of sequence as I have been frequently because of how I keep getting stuck. A friend had a bad day yesterday, and she read the first draft of Courting Apparitions and laments the fact that Basilie and Étienne don't have sex except for one in the entire book.

That is a bad, bad sentence. But let's move on.

Since my friend had a bad day, and I'm very close to that big sex scene, I thought I'd go ahead and write that scene to cheer her up.

In the tarot, there's a card called the Hanged Man. It's not the well-hung man, so get your mind out of the gutter. The hanged man is the guy who always looks at a situation differently from everyone else. If you watched Project Runway last night, he would be Casanova (who thought WAY out of the box) or even Ivy H. (her approach to the project was the opposite of everyone else).

A good sex scene has to have an element of the Hanged Man. If it's merely presenting what happened, it's not enough. If it's merely erotic and graphic, it's not enough.

I've talked in the past about every sex scene doing its job to move the plot, and enhance the character and show us about the relationship we're seeing. But it should also have that special quirkiness that makes it real.

In real life, this happens.

Like the time I asked my husband in the middle of things if he remembered whether or not I turned the oven off.

Or the time things went incredible and my husband thought something was wrong based on an unusual noise I made.

I already have a very powerful surprise for the revision to book three that shows how quickly "the other woman" picked up on a secret fantasy of the male character that his wife never noticed in 25 years together.

And don't even ask about the Tufula Tufts.

Take a Chance and Tap Dance

As writers, we often get to research topics that interest us and no one questions this. Like Nisha, from Pocono Lehigh Romance Writers, who spent last weekend at an archery lesson for her book (which sounds like an incredible retelling of some mythic Indian stuff).

For me, this usually means fashion and French stuff and Paris.

Artists get to explore their dreams in unique ways. Normal people could, but normally don't give themselves permission.

I gave myself permission.

There's a side bit in my story. It's serves a purpose, as an indicator of Étienne's health and... um... self-control. He learns to tap dance.

I have always wanted to tap dance, but I have cerebral palsy so it seems like a stupid thing for me to try and do. My daughter is in ballet and tap now. So, I asked her:

"If you knew something Mommy didn't know and wanted to learn, would you teach me?"

She said sure.

So I bought tap shoes.

And we started lessons. I love it. It took ten minutes for the six-year-old to forget anything else to teach me, so we turned to YouTube and we've started working on Rod Howell's dances classes from UnitedTaps.com.

I'm no Gene Kelly, but tap is teaching me lots of exercises for moving my feet and my ankles. It's also using muscles in my calves that I don't normally use. Which is great for my CP. I wonder if someone would have enrolled me in tap as a kid if I would have better control walking now...

So, it just goes to show, everybody needs to indulge. I've been told I don't know how to have fun, and this summer has worried me that maybe that's true. Tap dance is something that serves no purpose, other than having fun.

Yeah, I can blame Étienne, but really, I didn't need to learn to tap dance for him. I did it for me.

Reconnecting

Even though this is an edit of a third-ish draft, I have been rewriting some chapters here and there to boost their effectiveness. I have written and re-written some of these chapters several times in a week, which I have mentioned before... but there is something about it...

*intentional dramatic pause*

The struggle makes the success sweeter.

A writer friend and a member of my critique group asked me what Étienne was going to do to get his wife back. She wanted to know if he would do something "over the top." I told her no.

I lied.

Her simple question led me to think about it all day yesterday. When I started to write last night, the words and the emotion and the scope flooded out of me. I've now got the next draft almost done and I'm pleased though I'm missing one thing at the end...

The big, life-altering, mind-blowing, commitment-affirming kiss.

And trying to write something like that reminds a writer of a very big fact. As writers, everything we do must capture a truth of human existence. If this kiss does not capture every magic glimmer of their relationship, then I have failed.

Makes you want to test some kisses...

Empathy

Writers must possess incredible empathy-- and our empathy extends to things in the imagination.

I mentioned about a week ago that Basilie had thrown Étienne out, smack dab in the middle of what was supposed to be revisions to my second manuscript, Courting Apparitions. In order to understand the why, especially since it happened so suddenly and not as part of the drafting process, I went back and read the whole manuscript for clues (and they were there!)

But then I realized, I had a very pregnant woman, under emotional duress, and bad memories tormenting her not only in regards to how jealous her relationship makes her but also the fear associated with pregnancy.

I am now in the process of writing out what happened in Basilie's last pregnancy, even though I only need snippets for the chapter. I have to really understand what happened to her even though I can tell you in a succinct sentence what happened. And I can tell you in a paragraph how it altered her thinking about herself, her role as a wife, and her present frame of mind.

To capture successfully the magnitude and importance, I need to live the details with her, so her emotional state resonates viable and true in the present scene and doesn't fall flat.

To do that I must share her tragedy.

I'm nine pages into this, and it is very very sad, and I suspect it will take nine more pages to get it all down. In the end, the paragraph or bits of dialogue that reference this event from the chapter in question will automatically have the zing they need because Basilie's memories are now my memories and not merely a question of her internal conflicts and motivations.

Work habits

Any young or new writer must develop work patterns that work for them. I think the same is true for any project. The methods of how we work are unique to individuals.

I found myself inspired to write different scenes for my different characters and as a young writer, I never knew if this would be effective or not.

I started a big binder and wrote every scene on looseleaf paper and organized them in chronological order according to when the scenes happened in the story. This lead to some wonderful scenes, but I never got around to writing the "between bits."

In my current work, I don't allow myself to skip around for this very reason. It feels like I get off track.

But sometimes, when conditions change and you need a fresh outlook or a pause, skipping around on a storyline can help you reconnect with a character.

I have rewritten chapter fifteen of Courting Apparitions three times in the last week or so. Now, to propel myself through the changes in that chapter that made it difficult to write right, I am ALSO writing chapter seventeen.

Chapter fifteen is her point of view.
Chapter seventeen is his.

So looking at both side's simultaneously, even if his chapter is a couple days in the future, is helping me understand her behavior and what she needs to do to make his reaction what it is in chapter 17.

Moving Forward

My characters just finished a big battle with the bad guy and they won this round. I've been itching to keep going but... I haven't perfected my plan.

Since this is a second draft, that I've changed the trajectory on, I don't want to waste effort doing something in this chapter that doesn't move the plot forward. I have taken the outline I revised and sketched out the chapter as I suggested, but I noted that there's no action in the chapter. Nothing happens. It sets up several items for later resolution, but nothing happens in the actual chapter.

Now, can't have that.

The current chapter is a switch of POV from the male hero (Étienne) to his wife (Basilie). They have all contributed to the successful defeat of the bad guy (Galen).

Basilie has sustained some superficial wounds. The point of the chapter is to establish changes in behavior for Étienne, and to clarify Basilie's mindset regarding her soon-to-be born child, and finally, to establish some family history for Basilie.

This entry isn't necessarily about how I decide to resolve this, but to point out a realization I had of how many of my writing processes are physical. Under doctor's orders, I can't go ride my bike. I can't go shopping. And most painful to my process, I can't listen to my iPod and dance around like a lunatic.

Which leaves naps. Sometimes, when I try to go to sleep, the emptiness of my own head allows new ideas to pop in. Especially if I have been trying to think like that person for a while.

So what would Basilie do after a big fight? Should I pick her up in the ER? I'm going to have to write it out and try different things... But it's also like the way I cook:

Sometimes I look at the ingredients I have and contemplate all the ways to combine them until I hit a successful mix. But sometimes, I can be sitting, eating something completely different and get struck by lightning.

Last night I was thinking about chili, thawing in the fridge. I remembered we had pie crust and chicken and broccoli and various soups... and I had a eureka moment: POT PIE.

And sometimes, writing works the same way.

Immersion

So, today I volunteered to help my family answer phones at the business. Had to meet my dad at the office at 8:30, which meant leaving my house at 7 to bring daughter to her other grandparents, husband to work, and myself to the Poconos for duty.

In the first half hour, I had breakfast.

The next two hours, between the light phone calls, I wrote a strong draft of chapter 14 of my work in progress, Courting Apparitions.

After lunch I tried to progress with Chapter 15, but the ideas aren't fully formed enough, though I did sketch out the key moments of the chapter.

Next, I started to read one of the submissions for our critique group. I found this one difficult. And here comes my reflection for the day.

As a writer and a reader, I ask works to transport me. That requires three things: character, scene, and craft. I cannot rank any of these higher than the others.

CHARACTER: Each recurring character in your story must have a distinct flavor. His speech, his dress, he mannerisms. We should be able to tell this character even if the author only uses a pronoun instead of a name. That's how clear character development should be.

SCENE: As a reader, I need a sense of place. This involves enough background detail so I feel anchored but not so much I can't keep track of where I am and which elements are important. Smells, sights, sensations of light and dark. What other people are doing. And it must have the rich details, the pertinent details, but not the ordinary ones.

If I form a mental picture and you change that picture later by adding details that weren't there earlier that I made up... Well, I'm going to mistrust my other pictures.

CRAFT: Using too many prepositions, giving me sentences that are too bare-boned and don't have enough pace to keep me moving, or maybe using sentences that don't have that pizzazz to my ear... That will lose me. A great way to measure pizzazz is to read the work aloud. Believe me, you'll realize the lagging parts instantly.

Characterization

I have opted to review the first 150 pages of Courting Apparitions, the second volume of my Fashion and Fiends series and the ghost story of the trilogy.

By the middle of chapter two, I am amazed at how much characterization the dead person (Adelaide) has.

And she's dead.

It's a great reminder of the little things that make a character, and it's not always what that character *says* or *does*.

In this case, the character comes alive because of:
- memories provided by other characters
- nicknames revealed by other characters
- rumors about the character and the circumstances around her
- the stuff she left behind (like a collection of novelty rubber ducks)
- the smell of her perfume
- her pet

This is the same way to develop a character who's off stage. Their car is in the parking lot. Or the book they are reading in on the table. People are more than dialogues and actions.

Managing projects

My work on the werewolf short story was stalled by the 18-page essay I did for my take-home final in my French history class. Last night our critique group met, and it was only four of us, with three of us presenting chapters. I presented Chapter Seven of Courting Apparitions.

The beauty and agony of working with other writers in a critique format is when other people are right.

I leave these critique meetings feeling energized about my craft, but when they articulate problems that either I didn't notice or I thought I had fixed, it can be demoralizing. That is part of the process. And once you establish a relationship with your critique group, you learn to lean on certain members to find certain things.

You can rely on me to nitpick about tight sentence structure. One member of our group is what I like to call a visual reader, because she seems to visualize every detail in her mind and will let you know if anything seems out of place or confusing with the logistic flow especially with moving people from place to place. Another member seems very into verbs.

They also have opposite tastes when it comes to some things, which is good, because it shows how some readers will like what another reader doesn't.

But mostly, they start poking around in a chapter talking about the tension and the action and sometimes I realize, I've missed the boat as the author. That my text, which so clearly has a mission in my mind, has fallen completely flat on the page. Other writers will know what I mean when I say that sometimes you write something beautiful, with no particular flaws except one: it doesn't move the story forward as you intended. Then, the reader might ask, "Did I miss the point?"

As an author, I've had several experiences where people said this about a scene. So, I look at it and I read it. Removed from the creative impetus that spurred it, I no longer remember why it seemed so perfect. I cannot say why I wrote it.

And so it must go. The scene gets deleted. Or, as might happen with this manuscript, characters get deleted.

Yes, I am starting chapter 14 of Courting Apparitions, my second serious full draft, and my critique group has pointed out that some characters aren't adding anything.

So, they are between Chapters 7 & 8, and I have made the decision to remove Helen. But I'm not going backwards now. She will no longer exist from this point forward and I'll fully remove her in the next draft.

Hopefully we fix Pierre and Jules. There's been some rustling that they don't belong, they feel extraneous. They shouldn't be. They earn the right to be salvaged. But poor Helen, she's gone.

No matter what your project, you have to be willing to dismantle something that's not working, no matter how beautiful it looks.